Nolanisms

Some Nolan stories.

His front 2 bottom teeth have been very loose for a couple of weeks. Last week he appeared at the door after getting off of the school bus with his 2 teeth in his hand. He said "Mom, my hand is getting sweaty and tired from holding these so long." I asked when they fell out and he said another boy's backpack hit is face (accidentally) and they fell out on the bus. I assumed this was in the afternoon. As the story progressed and Matthew got involved, I found out that the teeth fell out in the morning just as the bus arrived at school. My first thought was "Oh my goodness, have you been holding those teeth in your hand all day???" "No!" he said just since I got them." I am thinking here - they fell out this morning - how in the world does this make sense? Full story from Matthew is that they fell out in the morning as the kids were unloading the bus, they couldn't find the teeth and went on to class. In the afternoon, the boy whose backpack caused the whole incident found both teeth on the floor in the bus! Crazy. Anyway, the tooth fairy brought him $2.00 and he was happy. Matthew insists that he once saw the tooth fairy fly away in the night. This story is a point of contention in our home however because Colin saw the tooth fairy at school during dental week and she "was tall as a person and did NOT fly"!

Today was fiesta parties at the elementary school. I arrived early to help set-up Nolan's classroom. He gets good behavior marks everyday (maybe one bad one all year) so I was checking out the behavior chart (color-coded). I am smugly thinking to myself "Oh my Nolan is sooo good at school, let's see who the mis-behaving kids are." I was looking at those names on the yellow line (warning line) and saw the familiar names of those Nolan says get in trouble often. I smiled as I didn't see Nolan's name. I continued to look and lo and behold there is Nolan's sunshine (with his name on it) down on the orange line (one before the red - office line). That's what I get for being so smug. "What happened to Nolan?" I asked the teacher (the kids were not in the class - they were at gym). She came over to quietly tell me that according to the other kids at his table he said "Jack A__." She was very polite and said he likely heard it at school and it wasn't a big deal but she had to skip the warning line for that. I didn't bring it up to Nolan until we got home (didn't want to ruin the party for him). He was embarrassed and upset about it but apparently did say it - says he heard it from another boy at the table (wooo - at least he didn't say he heard it at home!).

I have to tell dentist stories because this is really one of the harder jobs of moms. I always take the boys to the dentist. Never mind that the last appointment was at 5pm - still mom with 3 boys and no dad. Of course 2 sets of cavities on 2 boys. So here we go discussing the snacking schedule and how EVERY food has sugar in it besides water. Can we hold this lecture with Grandmas and Dads please??? Anyway, as I am talking to the dentist (it is now 6:40 - 1 hour and 40 minutes later) Colin is becoming increasingly restless and Marty is calling and texting every 2 seconds. As I apologize to the dentist for the interuptions and continue to silence my phone Colin is climbing on me and literally pulling my shirt down. I know the dentist has seen worse but it really makes a mom feel like a loser when she has to face the cavity issue yet again. Yes we brush twice a day, yes we use Act at night etc, etc. My kids have their mom's teeth (and sweet tooth), what can I say???

What is a Boy

An academic-type friend of ours in Austin once told me (as our children were playing and I made a comment about boys) that "gender is a social contstruct." What I didn't reply to him was that while I hold a bachelor's degree in Sociology and fully understand "gender contstructs," the scientific fact of the matter is: sex is now, always was, and ever shall be a biological fact that cannot be changed. He of course had 2 girls...

A co-worker of Marty's forwarded this to him. His father, Alan Beck, wrote it.

What is a Boy

Between the innocence of babyhood and the dignity of manhood we find a delightful creature called a boy. Boys come in assorted sizes, weights, and colors, but all boys have the same creed: to enjoy every second of every minute of every hour of every day and to protest with noise (their only weapon) when their last minute is finished and the adult males pack them off to bed at night. Boys are found everywhere—on top of, underneath, inside of, climbing on, swinging from, running around, or jumping to. Mothers love them, little girls hate them, older sisters and brothers tolerate them, adults ignore them, and Heaven protects them. A boy is Truth with dirt on its face, Beauty with a cut on its finger, Wisdom with bubble gum in its hair, and the Hope of the future with a frog in its pocket. When you are busy, a boy is an inconsiderate, bothersome, intruding jangle of noise. When you want him to make a good impression, his brain turns to jelly or else he becomes a savage, sadistic, jungle creature bent on destroying the world and himself with it. A boy is a composite—he has the appetite of a horse, the digestion of a sword-swallower, the energy of a pocket-sized atomic bomb, the curiosity of a cat, the lungs of a dictator, the imagination of a Paul Bunyan, the shyness of a violet, the audacity of a steel trap, the enthusiasm of a firecracker, and when he makes something, he has five thumbs on each hand. He likes ice cream, knives, saws, Christmas, comic books, the boy across the street, woods, water (in its natural habitat), large animals, Dad, trains, Saturday mornings, and fire engines. He is not much for Sunday School, company, schools, books without pictures, music lessons, neckties, barbers, girls, overcoats, adults, or bedtime. Nobody else is so early to rise, or so late to supper. Nobody else gets so much fun out of trees, dogs, and breezes. Nobody else can cram into one pocket a rusty knife, a half-eaten apple, three feet of string, an empty Bull Durham sack, two gum drops, six cents, a slingshot, a chunk of unknown substance, and a genuine supersonic code ring with a secret compartment. A boy is a magical creature—you can lock him out of your workshop, but you can’t lock him out of your heart. You can get him out of your study, but you can’t get him out of your mind. Might as well give up—he is your captor, your jailer, your boss, and your master—a freckled-faced, pint-sized, cat-chasing, bundle of noise. But when you come home at night with only shattered pieces of your hopes and dreams, he can mend them like new with two magic words, "Hi Dad!"

As Colin Sees It

Funny things Coin says: Most nights after we've put the kids to bed, Marty sits down to watch a little TV. This usually involves sports. Some nights (if Colin's had a nap that day), Colin gets up to watch with us. As a general rule, Marty controls the remote :). One night the three of us were watching and Marty left the room for one reason or another. Colin's eyes lit up, he looked at me and said "Mom, now we can watch Cooking!" A boy after my own heart.

Today in the car Colin asked me "why a head is called a head" and "why don't tornados get hooked if they step on a hook?" It is very windy today - thus the tornado discussion.